VALENTINE’S DAY
This is Saturday, February 14, 2009. HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY! I had a very nice day today. It was one of the nicest of this special day, and I have experienced many great Valentine days during my 90 years.
First of all, my three daughters checked in with their Valentine greetings. I always enjoy Mary’s, Joan’s and Sue’s visits. We see them more often now, that we are all living in Fairfield.
This morning, the phone rang, and I debated whether to answer it, or let the call go through to Voice Mail. (We get a lot of “junk” phone calls - most of the messages are recordings.) I decided to answer - I’m glad that I did. It was Dody - my high school sweetheart - calling, to wish me a Happy Valentines Day and say “I love you.” I first heard her speak those tender words 75 years ago. They still perked up my congestive heart. I didn’t hear the words of a mature- 89 year old woman, but the bubbly- giggly words of a 15 year old! Music for my soul.
Dody and I went steady for her last three years of high school, and my last two years of high school and first year of college. “Going steady” may seem strange, and quaint, today, but then we were all comfortable with the custom. When I wasn’t playing in the high school band, playing football or running track, I would walk her home from school. One of my hands held hers (I must have been afraid of her getting away!), and carrying our books with my other hand. When I was with her I had goose bumps. I am sure that most people who are in love experience this same emotion! I looked forward to double, and triple dating, (no seat belts back then), with my friends, especially, to the Friday night dances in the Berea High School gym.
In the summer of 1937, (during the Great Depression), the New York Central Railroad was consolidating their offices. My Dad was transferred from Cleveland to Detroit, and we moved from Berea to Ypsilanti. This really put a crimp on Dody’s and my romance. It tested the old adage - “Absence makes the heart grow fonder” ---(of someone else!) While I visited her a few times in Berea, and she reciprocated by coming to Ypsilanti once, the distance between us became too big an obstacle. Too, World War II came along and scrambled the lives of so many of us - distant military transfers and meeting new people. The generation before ours was born and died in the same town - never venturing far a field. Dody went on to Baldwin Wallace College, in Berea, where she met her future husband. I ended up in Tulare for primary flight training. This is where I met Marie - at Rankin Field, where she was working. That was 65 years ago!
This evening, Quail Creek put on a very nice Valentine Dinner. Joan was our guest and we had a very nice time. When we got to our table, there was a unique favor on the plate - huge strawberries that had been dipped in dark chocolate! They were packed in a clear plastic container, tied with a red ribbon, with the words “Love” printed along it. I was impressed. With the price of the cacao bean going out of sight, this was a valuable gift. To top it off, they served a delicious lobster dinner. What a way to go! A great harpist played during dinner. Before leaving, I stopped by and commented what a talented musician she was. I told her that I enjoyed her playing “Embraceable You”. I explained that it was my wife’s and my special song for 65 years. She told me that a friend of hers did the arranging of it.
In all fairness, I must say that the festive spirit was dampened when I watched Marie during dinner. She wasn’t in the moment. Her previously sharp brain has betrayed her. It is not functioning properly. Consequently, she either doesn’t always respond, or her brain gives improper signals. She knows that something is wrong, but doesn’t comprehend. She doesn’t complain and is her former -sweet self. When she asks me to help her, and tells me that she loves me, it tears me apart. Alzheimer -dementia is a terrible curse - not only for the person experiencing it, but also for the family that is trying to cope, and understand it. We hear more about depression now, than we used to a generation ago, because of better diagnosis and reporting, and a larger population exposed to the disease, Too, we are all living longer! Previous generations usually died of something else, even though an autopsy at death would probably show early warnings of the dementia. Too, with our increased longevity, we are experiencing other chronic health problems. Other generations usually didn’t experience these ailments because they died first.
I was all wound up and couldn’t go to sleep. I got up, and so it wasn‘t a total loss, I put a CD of Frank Sinatra on the machine. Wouldn’t you know, he was singing “My Funny Valentine”.
RCL 2/14/09.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Friday, February 13, 2009
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEANNE!
Today is Friday the 13th! My only sister, Jeanne, was born 89 years ago today -also on a Friday. She was 20 months younger than I. We were close - almost like being twins.
Our Mother was visiting her parents when she went into labor. Jeanne was born in our grandparents’ home. I never got all the details as to whether a doctor was there, a mid-wife or no one.
Our Dad worked for the New York Central Railroad. Jeanne and I traveled quite a bit, free of charge - using his pass. We both were out of high school and living with our parents at 715 Oak street in Ypsilanti, Michigan.
We visited Niagara Falls. We also went from Detroit to Cleveland a few times to see Glenn Miller and his orchestra, and other “Swing” bands play at the Hippodrome theatre. Jeanne attended my graduation from Bombardiers’ School in Victorville, California, on October 31, 1942.
Jeanne went on to marry Bob Gibbens, and they had eight children. Bob was the brother of Stephen Gibbens, who along with his wife Maggie have been our best friends for over 63 years.
We visited Jeanne and Bob - numerous times - for many years - both in Michigan and in Florida. They, in turn, also reciprocated, by visiting us in Vallejo many times.
Jeanne died on September 24, 1998 at the hospital in Stuart Florida, at the age of 78. She never recovered from surgery for an abdominal hernia ten days previously.
Happy Birthday, Jeanne. I miss you a lot.
RCL - 2/13/09.
Today is Friday the 13th! My only sister, Jeanne, was born 89 years ago today -also on a Friday. She was 20 months younger than I. We were close - almost like being twins.
Our Mother was visiting her parents when she went into labor. Jeanne was born in our grandparents’ home. I never got all the details as to whether a doctor was there, a mid-wife or no one.
Our Dad worked for the New York Central Railroad. Jeanne and I traveled quite a bit, free of charge - using his pass. We both were out of high school and living with our parents at 715 Oak street in Ypsilanti, Michigan.
We visited Niagara Falls. We also went from Detroit to Cleveland a few times to see Glenn Miller and his orchestra, and other “Swing” bands play at the Hippodrome theatre. Jeanne attended my graduation from Bombardiers’ School in Victorville, California, on October 31, 1942.
Jeanne went on to marry Bob Gibbens, and they had eight children. Bob was the brother of Stephen Gibbens, who along with his wife Maggie have been our best friends for over 63 years.
We visited Jeanne and Bob - numerous times - for many years - both in Michigan and in Florida. They, in turn, also reciprocated, by visiting us in Vallejo many times.
Jeanne died on September 24, 1998 at the hospital in Stuart Florida, at the age of 78. She never recovered from surgery for an abdominal hernia ten days previously.
Happy Birthday, Jeanne. I miss you a lot.
RCL - 2/13/09.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Heartwarming
Heartwarming Sight
Marie didn’t feel well during last night. She didn’t feel like going down to the dining room, with me, for breakfast. So, when the CNA came in this morning, to help her get dressed, Marie declined her offer. The nurse authorized her having breakfast in the room. When I finished eating breakfast, I ordered pancakes and bacon, fresh fruit and milk, and brought it up to her.
She was still in her pajamas at noon, and didn’t feel like getting dressed for lunch. So, I brought back a grilled -cheese sandwich for her. Our youngest daughter Sue, brought back our laundry (which she does for us) just before dinner. Marie was glad to see her, and perked up a bit. Sue asked her if she could help her get dressed for dinner. Marie agreed, and Sue helped her dress.
It was very inspiring for me, to see Sue returning the love to her Mother, that she had received, over 45 years ago! My thoughts flashed back to that period when Marie would supervise, or help, Anne, Mary, Beth, Joan and Sue get dressed for church, or for school. It was no small task when you throw in the hair brushing and rubber bands! Yet, I don’t ever remember being late to Mass, or seeing a “Tardy” mark on their report cards.
Role reversal is a very interesting phenomenon. I only wish that I had a son to help me dress when the need comes. After Sue was born, I mentioned to Marie that I would like to have a son - knowing that she had the same desire. But, calling on her superior intellect, she said “No more. If you want a son, adopt one.” I either never got around to do this, or gave it up as not a good idea. An example of unfinished business!
When I was young, I should have realized what would lie ahead. My Mom and Dad earned “Sainthood” recognition, for all of the tender-loving care they provided in our home. They were caretakers for my Grandmother Flood, and her sister Aunt Nellie. (They both died in our home.) They also boarded my sister Jeanne, and her daughter Rae, for a couple of years, while Jeanne’s husband Bob was stationed in Italy. They cared for my brother Bob in their home, after he was released from a lengthy stay at St. Josephs Hospital in Ann Arbor. He had been critically injured in an auto accident.
I pray that my parents have passed their TLC genes on to me.
RCL 2/12/09.
Marie didn’t feel well during last night. She didn’t feel like going down to the dining room, with me, for breakfast. So, when the CNA came in this morning, to help her get dressed, Marie declined her offer. The nurse authorized her having breakfast in the room. When I finished eating breakfast, I ordered pancakes and bacon, fresh fruit and milk, and brought it up to her.
She was still in her pajamas at noon, and didn’t feel like getting dressed for lunch. So, I brought back a grilled -cheese sandwich for her. Our youngest daughter Sue, brought back our laundry (which she does for us) just before dinner. Marie was glad to see her, and perked up a bit. Sue asked her if she could help her get dressed for dinner. Marie agreed, and Sue helped her dress.
It was very inspiring for me, to see Sue returning the love to her Mother, that she had received, over 45 years ago! My thoughts flashed back to that period when Marie would supervise, or help, Anne, Mary, Beth, Joan and Sue get dressed for church, or for school. It was no small task when you throw in the hair brushing and rubber bands! Yet, I don’t ever remember being late to Mass, or seeing a “Tardy” mark on their report cards.
Role reversal is a very interesting phenomenon. I only wish that I had a son to help me dress when the need comes. After Sue was born, I mentioned to Marie that I would like to have a son - knowing that she had the same desire. But, calling on her superior intellect, she said “No more. If you want a son, adopt one.” I either never got around to do this, or gave it up as not a good idea. An example of unfinished business!
When I was young, I should have realized what would lie ahead. My Mom and Dad earned “Sainthood” recognition, for all of the tender-loving care they provided in our home. They were caretakers for my Grandmother Flood, and her sister Aunt Nellie. (They both died in our home.) They also boarded my sister Jeanne, and her daughter Rae, for a couple of years, while Jeanne’s husband Bob was stationed in Italy. They cared for my brother Bob in their home, after he was released from a lengthy stay at St. Josephs Hospital in Ann Arbor. He had been critically injured in an auto accident.
I pray that my parents have passed their TLC genes on to me.
RCL 2/12/09.
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